Monday, June 18, 2012

Ranty Pants

Because I have been living a particularly insular life of late, I haven't been able to vent much. Whining is bad, but the occasional vent is good. Releases pressure and all that.

Trouble is, much of my internet life is observed ... by my parents, now both of them; by co-workers or even supervisors; by potential clients, etc. I've had to hold back on quite of bit of venting.

The pressure having built to a critical mass, however, I'm going to allow myself one tiny rant.



At one of my rock star gigs this weekend, people kept coming up to me to tell me about oncoming storms. I was at a reenactment, where there were tents and horses and such, but our part of it was indoors and the people with horses always have someone on picket duty. It had rained heavily earlier in the day, and at that moment we could also all see the gathering clouds out the window.

Here's a typical conversation:

Guy comes up to me at the microphone between tunes (never a great time) and holds his iPhone up for me to see.
Me, noticing it's not on: It's black.
Him, thinking he's actually showing me something: Yes, I know, scary isn't it.
Me: No, your phone is black.
Him: Yep, that's quite the storm coming.
Me: Yes, I can see the clouds.
Him: Oh, my iPhone is off. Hold on. [fiddles with iPhone]
Me, in my head: [Dude, I'm trying to run a dance here. What do you want me to do about it?]
Him: Here you go! [shows me the radar on his phone, which confirms what we can all see out the window]
Me, just to get rid of him and get back to my job: Thanks, I'll make an announcement.

I tell the dancers that a storm is coming and that they may want to tend to their tents. A few people glance at the window, but no one leaves. Not five minutes later, another guy (why is it always a guy?) comes up to tell me a storm is coming with quarter-size hail.

Really? Because I just announced a storm. A storm we could all see out the window. Clearly, because you didn't hear me announce it, another announcement probably won't alert anyone, let alone prevent the storm. What else do you want me to do?

The hail, btw, never materialized.

2 comments:

Susan Armstrong said...

Ohh...my...(insert deity) YES..."live is observed" I feel like I'm in a fishbowl...or on a partyline.

Susan Armstrong said...

DOH..."life"